Thursday, August 02, 2012

Roller coaster days

Part of the challenge of dealing with any illness is the roller coaster of activity and emotions it takes you on.  One moment you're in waiting mode: waiting for test results, wondering how best to fill your time productively so you can keep your eyes fixed on Jesus instead of fixated on the possibilities before you. The next moment you receive a call, and you spend several frantic hours making appointments and fixing your schedule, and then another day scrambling to assemble missing pieces of documentation- films, reports, etc.  When you are on the rollercoaster, some of it may be exhilarating, but you rather look forward to the level ground you no longer have access to.

I'm on that roller coaster, and longing for the boring old level ground. I can see it, and I can sometimes imagine I am there, but then I realize we have been slowly climbing a hill and are abut to take a plunge again. How good boring old "normal" looks from afar!

God has gone before me on this ride, and He has brought things together beautifully so far.  I have seen a top rheumatologist and am awaiting results of a large amount of blood work. And now I have CT-scans and pulmonary function tests planned for Tuesday at UNM, with an appointment with a top pulmonologist for Thursday.  I will be scrambling for films tomorrow all over Northern New Mexico, and trying to figure out the best way to handle my week.  The fact that I have seen these two doctors in such short order is almost miraculous, and I am grateful.

I appreciate your prayer support, Gentle Readers.  Those prayers are like the seat belt that holds me in during the ride. By God's mercy, I am secure. If you would like specific prayers, here are a few:
  • Pray that my blood work would tell us something useful and give us direction as we proceed.
  • Pray that I could be productive and keep my eyes on Christ, serving Him and others around me, and not all-consumed with yet another illness.
  • Pray that the upcoming tests would show the docs what they need and that I would get through them well.
  • Pray for the planning and gathering that has to happen to make next week work smoothly.
  • Pray that the process threatening my eyes would be halted now without impairment to my vision.
  • Pray that my inner vision would be strong to trust God in these roller-coaster days.

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